GOTCHA DAY...November 29, 2010

Here is an account of our wonderful Gotcha day...

(It is long, but I consider it an entry for Mahaela's babybook which is more that I did for the other four kids!)



Our driver met us at our apartment at 7am. We drove to get Rosi, our translator, which was a wonderful surprise as we were told on Sunday that she would not be going with us. We drove a little over 3 hours from Sofia to get to the orphanage in Haskovo. We arrived around 11am. We were told we could take as long as we needed and ask all our questions. We were concerned that we needed to hurry because of needing to get back to Sofia to do passport pictures. The passport office was open to 7pm, so that gave us lots of time.
When we arrived at the orphanage, Mrs. Toncheva, the head nurse, met us. She was very happy and excited to see us. As we entered the orphanage, other nurses were waiting to greet us. They asked for clothes to dress Mahaela in, but then they offered to let me change her if I would like. I thought that would be fine. As we went back to the nurses office, the staff followed us and then we could hear M. coming down the hall. She was talking the whole way. As she entered the room, she was so excited saying that her Mama and Tate were here for her and that she was going to America. She told all her nurses that we had come for her. It was exciting. She hugged her Mommy, Daddy, and Aubrey. She new Aubrey's name as well as her other brothers and sister. Everyone was very entertained by her excitement.
They offered to let us take her clothes if we would like and not change her. I was thankful for the offer as I would have rather had the memento from the orphanage than have her wearing what we brought for her. She had on the tennis shoes that we brought her in the summer.
There was a little bit of paperwork exchanged and we signed that we were picking her up...that she was now in our custody. They gave us her medical record, immunization record. The director of the orphanage came into greet us also and spoke a little about her condition. He said she was one of six children in Bulgaria that has her condition and that she is in the best health of them all. He explained that she still gets blue and tires easily with exertion or anxiety. Bill then told him that we found her medical document/description to be right on par with how she looked and that our doctors in the states were pleased with how she sounded/looked on paper. Bill then thanked them and told them how thankful we were for the care she had received and that it was evident that she had been well cared for. I couldn't hold back the tears as that was exactly my feeling and what I also wanted to convey to all her nurses--just deep gratitude. They told us how happy they were for M. to have a family such as ours. They told us that God had blessed her and Bill told them that God has blessed us by placing her in our family. It was just a sweet, sincere exchange.
About five nurses sat in the room with us and possibly 3-4 outside the room. I had a list of questions that I began asking. They would all answer at the same time! (Bulgarians seem to talk over each other all the time). I asked what they would remember about M. and they said that she always woke up with a smile--even when she is sick. They said she likes to watch her cartoons before she goes to bed!
Here are other questions that I asked:
Favorite foods? Meat! (sounded like salami, sausages), bananas, mandarin oranges, tomatoes
When does she wake, nap, go to sleep? 6-7--whenever she hears all the nurses coming and going. She doesn't really nap anymore--maybe just 30 min. or less from 2-2:30.
She goes to bed around 8:30. She has dinner at 6:30, but then eats again when the night nurses come in.
How has she celebrated birthdays and Christmas? Christmas they do parties and presents and Santa and it sounds like birthdays they are the center of attention, with the first birthday being a really big deal.
Has she ever left the orphanage for overnights or to anyone's home? Rosi answered that this would not be allowed (although we have heard of other children having that opportunity), but they did say that she has been to downtown Haskovo many times.
Does she suck her thumb or fingers, or did she? She sucks her thumb just while going to sleep and then takes it out. (HA--she is a straight-up thumbsucker!)
Does she like animals or will she be afraid? She likes animals and will like our dog.
How will she do sleeping at night (she has her own room with a crib at our home?) She will need a light on and the door open. She is used to a crib, but not a dark, quiet room. They said she is a light sleeper.
I told them that when M. is older, she may ask about her birth parents. I asked if they knew anything of them and why they had placed her for adoption. They gave an answer which I will keep for M. I intended to ask about whether her birth parents knew anything of her and that she was being adopted. I didn't ask it, but I got the feeling that some or most of them knew the birth parents. It is not a very big town. I tend to believe they know she is doing well.

One of the nurses gave M. a little box with Icons in it that had been specially blessed for Misha. I'm not sure all she said, but she was emotional and had been on our first visit as well. She also gave a little Christmas teddy bear ornament. Someone gave her a large babydoll along with the little backpack with items in it from our first trip.
Mrs. Toncheva gave M. a little gift bag with a very special necklace for when she is older and a ceramic plate with Icons. She also had two disks with photos of M. one with random photos and one with birthday photos. She said she was not able to give us pictures of when she was very young as her computer had crashed losing all those photos. (I know that feeling.) I am thankful for any photos that we are able to have. She also included brochures of Haskovo for keepsakes. She said M. came to the orphanage on December 13, 2007. I think she immediately had a special place in their hearts. They can't possibly know how meaningful these items are to me. They hold all the memories from the first three years of Mahaela's life and I cherish any connection that we can have to that time and these people who have loved her.

Mahaela was able to give her caregivers small gift bags with gloves, lotion/soap set, a letter that my friend translated for me to give her caregivers, and also a little photo charm necklace with a picture of Mahaela in it. They said that was the best gift to be given. I think so, too. Mahaela took one of the necklaces to wear also.

We felt like we had asked all we needed to. Our driver, who had been to another nearby orphanage to take photos, was returning to pick us up. We asked if we could see her room one last time and take a picture with everyone also. We saw her room, our photos on the wall, the book we sent her, the birthday package we sent sitting on the table. M. walked all the way to her room and then back out to the foyer. She led us all like the leader of the parade. I kept thinking and said to Bill, "This is the last time!"

As we stood in the foyer, someone ran back to get Mahaela's coats that they wanted us to have. They said they think of only M. when they see the coats anyway, as they belonged to her.




We all walked outside--it was such a mild, warm 60 degree day. They did the tradition of good luck by pouring water on the orphanage steps and leading Mahaela through it down the steps. They were all parading, leading her to our car. She even saw her driver that we had met from our first trip. It felt like this monumental moment. They were all saying goodbye and kissing her. Mrs. Toncheva put her in the middle seat of the car as I hugged most of the nurses. As Aubrey said, I went into the "ugly" cry just a bit, but even Aubrey was crying. All the nurses were crying. I'm still crying as I write this! I will never forget that moment, standing in the street next to our car. We drove off with them all waving, saying goodbye...then to look down and see our little girl sitting between Bill and me, ready for her new life.



I need to clear my head for a bit, so I will post this now. I will post again with the remainder of our first day. This has been the bulk of our Gotcha Day.

We are praising the Lord, that's all I can say!

One of the Best Parts about Blogging...

Friends...the old ones and the new ones--friends that my husband doesn't even know I have. I have to preface things with "my bloggy friend..." I am so thankful for all the ears I have and for the encouragement and prayers I get in return. I am so thankful for all of you. Thanks for walking with me on this journey.

So, this is the day...
Love you all!

Paris en route to Bulgaria

We actually got out of our house feeling as organized and prepared as we could be...what didn't get done and could drive me crazy, I am completely ok with. Thanks to our friends and family for offers of help to get us on our way and for caring for our kids while we are away.

We have had a wonderful two days in Paris. It is almost 2 am and we are just back to our room after dinner. Jet lag and naps have allowed us to enjoy the "nightlife." Although Paris doesn't seem to need much sleep either! We will leave our hotel about 9:30 am to head to the airport and be on our way to Bulgaria. We have really enjoyed our time here, but have talked mostly about what Monday will be like and getting Mahaela. I think we all have a little bit of nerves building as we anticipate what our lives will be like.


Job 23:10 is a verse that has always been meaningful to me. It's a promise I have clung to many times and especially through this adoption. "He knows the way that I take, when he has tried me, I shall come forth as gold." It has always given me the hope of a "good" ending or else molding me to be more Christ like due to His refiners fire! (Both would be my desire.) When this adoption has thrown us a curve or tested my patience, I knew it was for my good, and I assumed it would have this positive outcome of a completed adoption. Well, I am about to meet my treasure of Gold! I feel so blessed. God has known all along where this course would take us and what the ending would be...Mahaela JoMae.

Tomorrow we will arrive in Sofia and settle into our apartment. I'm sure we will leave very early Monday morning for the orphanage in Haskovo. I am excited to be able to take a full suitcase of donations from our family and friends (I had just mentioned that warm clothing would be nice.) People gave so much!
Here is a list of the items we were able to give:
21 gloves/mittens
11 hats
22 onesies
9 sleepers
1 scarf
6 tights
22 pairs socks
6 sweatsuits
1 coat
4 pants
17 shirts
8 sunglasses
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!

Our Amazing Family and Friends!

We had the best night!! Our Hauter Family gave us a surprise party for our 40th birthdays. Bill and I both turn 40 the week after we return from Bulgaria. We already thought we were getting the best gift ever by bringing Mahaela home--and we are! But our sweet family and best friends surprised us tonight. We thought we were going to dinner with friends and had to pick up one of the couples and as we pulled up to the garage, there was the big sign hanging on the garage door. It was a surprise to both of us and one that we never could have imagined. The best part was the complete excitement and affirmation we feel from them all as we get ready to go get Mahaela. Here is what they were all wearing when we got there...

Notice Mahaela's initials in the heart and her anticipated Gotcha date. They are a blue/gray color, almost like a dark jean color. They are so cool. Even the kids had tshirts, in a baby blue color. They are a treasure for sure! We had talked about doing tshirts and it never worked out. I'm not creative and it just kept taking a back seat to other things. Our family all got tshirts as a gift. We absolutely love them. You can bet this will be a square on Mahaela's tshirt quilt someday! I wish I had a picture of our family wearing them, but I didn't know I would need my camera!

I am so glad I didn't ruin this awesome surprise. Until Friday morning I still felt like we might bail out...I just felt on the fence about going out. The Lord absolutely worked it out. It wouldn't have taken too much to talk me into it though. I'm well aware that these fun nights out without kids are going to be a thing of the past for awhile--at least that is what I am expecting. Thank you to my wonderful friends and family.

As an update...Monday and Tuesday were very productive days and I felt like I was getting some big things done. Aubrey's room is painted, guest room/junk room cleared out, Mahaela's room ready. Furniture in it's places in the girls rooms. Wed, Thurs, Friday turned into unproductive, busy days. Tomorrow is a prize with no games on the schedule! I keep trying to pace myself, crossing things off my list. What's important will get done, the rest doesn't matter.

I wanted to post a couple shots of Mahaela's room. It is exactly the same bedroom we have had for 6 years now, since Lindsey was a newborn. I'm happy to have another girl to fill it.

We left a picture of this room with Mahaela on the first trip. We hope she recognizes it and feels secure in her new room. Soon, soon, soon!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY GIRL!!!

Happy Birthday to my little brown-eyed girl on the other side of the world. It is just morning where you are, just after the stroke of midnight here, and you are my sunshine! I am thanking Jesus for the life that you were given, for the life you were given a chance to live. You are precious in His sight and you are precious to us.
We can't stop thinking about you. Daddy and I are so excited to just sit and watch YOU and be with YOU. We are getting so close to that moment.
Being THREE years old is awesome. It is such a precious age! I hope your package came in time for your special day. Enjoy sharing your treats with your friends. We will see you so soon.

Love you, Mahaela!

Hugs and Kisses,
Mommy and Daddy

Comments that come when filters are off:

Some people really don't have a filter at all. Some people make comments to give us something to think about in case we haven't thought of it ourselves yet. I have read the lists of things that you should never say to someone who is or has adopted. Not having a child home yet, I don't feel overly sensitive about comments like, "are they real sisters?" or "where are her real parents?" I understand where these comments come from. They are mostly from people who think positive, but are just very curious. The comments that annoy me or will annoy me are the kind like "their last one was adopted and she just gave them such a hard time." You know, the horror stories. Or "life was great for that family and then they ruined it by adopting." These comments serve no purpose. They are hypothetical. By the way, if our life appears ruined years from now, it has nothing to do with making this "poor choice" to adopt. It has everything to do with God testing us, wanting to reveal himself more fully to us. God never promised a perfect life. He just promises to always be with us. I have complete assurance in that.
But, back to comments that people make...here is a short exchange that Bill had with a co-worker. It went something like this:
"So what exactly is wrong with her?"
"How will you take care of her?"
"Have you thought about this?"
"You know she may not live long."
Bill just responded with short answers and a smile/smirk.
I think he wanted more time to maybe talk us out of it! Crazy!

I completely understand how a caring person may have a conversation with us, asking these same type of questions. The above exchange was mindless, foolish, and out of ignorance.

Here are the answers to those questions:

She has a congenital heart defect. She has had surgery and will require more.

We will care for her to the best of our ability just as we have cared for our other children and just as countless families have cared for their children with a serious, chronic disease. We have the means, the support, the resources to give her the best care possible. She deserves our best.

We have thought about this, but more importantly, we have prayed about it. God brought her to us. She is ours. We are confident and have perfect peace that before the beginning of time He knew Mahaela and knew He would set her in our family.

As Bill responded, she most definitely has a decreased life span. She is high risk. But she may live a wonderful, "long" life. Medicine is always changing and her prognosis is unpredictable. None the less, we cherish getting to live life with her. We can't live today dreading what may come tomorrow.

Just wanted to share. We are very open to comments, questions, discussions, but some people need to put on their thinking caps first!


Less than 2 weeks, we will tuck her in at bedtime!!

Mommy #2

Mommy #2...and that would be Aubrey. She is so excited to meet Mahaela. She is packing and making lists for me to pack. She has Mahaela's bag almost packed! She has been my encouragement today. She was wishing it was Friday night because she was wanting to pull an all-nighter with me. She would have tonight if it wasn't for church tomorrow. She told me she was so proud of me today--for getting so much done and "for adopting." So sweet. It was a fairly productive day, but not a great mommy day. I am so thankful for my sweet neighbor who had Lindsey almost all day. I was feeling so guilty because I left the boys and Lindsey home during Aubrey's basketball game and was gone much longer than I wanted to be. Each time I called to check up on them, the boys said Lindsey was with the neighbors. She had a great day of playing. Certainly eased my guilt. She and Reese came in at one point to ask if Linds could go to the pancake supper in town. Both of them had wet heads from playing in their jacuzzi tub in swimsuits. How fun is that? She finished off the night with a barbie movie, came home and immediately fell asleep on the floor. The boys were on their own most of the day, but enjoyed brain waisting TV and video games to their heart's content--"Mom of the Year."
Aubrey got her hair cut after her games. The boys had their evals for basketball. Then Aubrey and I went to get paint for her room and use some coupons that expired today. Got Aubrey some boots. Put together a crib for Mahaela that I bought at IKEA last weekend. She is still in a crib and this style was very similar to her crib now--minimalist. I had started painting a dresser for one of the girls a couple days ago and was really disappointed with the finish. The finish was rough and very "chalky" feeling. I bought a new quart of another brand in the exact same sheen, but with much better results. The dresser has a hutch with it also that is a nightmare to paint. I painted it blue for Jake, 9 years ago. That paint job looked awesome. This paint job, not so great--maybe I'm rushing it?? 2 coats down. Maybe 2 more to get it done. Hoping to do that tomorrow and be done with the furniture. This dresser will go in Lindsey's new room and Lindsey's furniture will go to Mahaela.
I have some big goals for this week: (Don't bore yourselves...this list is for me!)
Paint Aubrey's room
make and purchase caregiver gifts.
get my Sunday School curriculum in order to hand over to my replacement--waiting for God to reveal to us who that may be??
Clean out my Sun. School room a bit
Clean guest room--Hoarders Anonymous, I'll just leave it at that
finalize Mahaela's room
finalize Lindsey's room
Get rid of summer clothes from boys drawers
Get carpets cleaned in a couple rooms
all the while keeping up with the house so that I can be ready to pack next Monday, Tuesday

Hoping some adrenalin gets me through the week...nothing like working under pressure. As Aubrey reminded me, I am a procrastinator!

Orphan Care and Plane Tickets

We had an Orphan Care Meeting at our home tonight with a great bunch of people. It was really encouraging--just a great blessing to be with others who also have a heart for the fatherless.

Well, I was all happy and proud of myself getting plane tickets last night...only to wake up to a vague email and no actual ticket confirmation. First guy said not to worry--after I waited on hold about 45 minutes, took a shower and everything. He said we would hear within 24 hours. So I felt confident to wait for news...but then reality set in. I was getting worried that something was not right with our three tickets. Mahaela already had a ticket # issued. Then another phone call a few hours later when I couldn't take it any longer. Blood pressure sky-rocketing! It was maddening. The only thing he could tell me was that there was no way I was going to get confirmation because Delta would not agree to the fare that I had already given my credit card payment for. I've seen the "bait and switch" when you go to actually pay, but I have never had it after you actually submit payment. Completely Bait and Switch! But after 12 hours had passed tickets continued to climb as there were very few seats left on our flights. He told me it would be $800 more to book the same itinerary (and again wait up to 24 hours for actual ticketing.) Crazy. Thought I was having a head bleed! Called back again after I cooled down a bit and then listened to the whole story again from another Expedia agent. Coming up with a price was like throwing a dart at a moving dart board...she quoted about 3 prices and finally came up with I would owe another $475. I had just a few more hours before I would need to cancel Mahaela's ticket if I thought we couldn't be ticketed on the same flights. So I just had to buck up and pay the difference. So funny, not funny-haha, that I spent hours trying to find the best deal and in the end I just bit it and didn't even care any more! Tonight, I at least have flight ticket numbers and confirmation numbers. Seems like everything is ok. Called Delta to remind them that she is a minor traveling with us because we were ticketed separately. I will call Air France to tell them the same later.
I'm so thankful to have two weekends ahead of me before we leave, although tomorrow will be busy with games. Such is life. Wish I could have two Saturdays every week!

CHA-CHING!!

I just purchased airline tickets. Probably not a smart idea at this time of the day, but I just wanted to get it done. We leave in a day less than two weeks! Yippeee!
$4199.90 total cost for 4 tickets. Overall, I am happy because Bill through at a budget for tickets a while back and I stayed well under that. We paid about $1500 per ticket for our first flight over in July. This time we were about $1000 per ticket. Mahaela's ticket cost more than ours! I really got the flights that I wanted which is always great. No 6 am flights, nice layovers, no unnecessary stops--how I like to fly!
Now, if you are looking to fly to Bulgaria, don't compare our numbers straight up...what I was getting around to saying is that we are making a stop in Paris for 2 nights! It's a real bummer to fly all the way to Europe and not see as much as you can. Since Aubrey will be with us, we really wanted her to see something else. This whole experience is a chance of a lifetime on so many levels. Bill and I will celebrate our 40th birthdays with this little jaunt. We both turn 40 the week after we get home, so this is how we justify it. But still, we are flying to Paris and Sofia for about $500 less per ticket than our first trip.
Every step makes it feel more real. Thanks to many of you for the well wishes, prayers, and comments. They are all appreciated.

Donations for Orphanage

I wanted to put this out to all my local friends who may read this blog...I love the three of you, LOL! I would like to take a suitcase of donations for the orphanage. I took clothing and other items the first trip and would like to do the same this trip. Here are items they can use as ideas:
undershirt
pajamas
tights-apparently boys and girls wear these all winter long!
hats
warm clothing-sweat suits, pants, shirts
socks
The children are up to 4 years old at her orphanage, so infant to 3T sizing would be great.
There are so many other items, but my brain has frozen at the moment!
Anything we bring them will be so appreciated.
We are leaving November 25--Thanksgiving Day!

Buy a T-shirt

Our nephew and niece, Steve and Emily, are in process to adopt a little boy from Ethiopia. We are so excited for the journey they are on and can't wait to meet their little boy someday.

Check out her blog and buy a tshirt! www.emhauter.blogspot.com
They are doing a fundraiser through Ordinary Hero (OH). OH is an amazing organization, doing amazing things for orphans. They have really cool tshirts, too! Check them out, you may find one of their shirts is "what you never knew you always wanted!!"

Travel Dates

Praising the Lord today! After a crazy back and forth communication with agencies, we have our travel dates. We will arrive in Bulgaria on Sunday, November 28th. Gotcha Day will be Nov. 29.
I feel like I have had a full time job today of working on the computer trying to find airfare. We usually do it all ourselves, but the one way ticket of a minor is causing a problem. Plus, the search engines consider their fares already discounted and do not give further discounts for children--as I was told by an agent today. Hopefully we will secure something soon. We are quickly approaching the end of the 14 day advance fare incentive.
As of the weekend, I thought we could travel as early as the 21st. Now today, I find I have just a little more time. I bought a crib over the weekend and primed a dresser tonight. I will paint it tomorrow. That will be a nice project to cross of my list.
In less than three weeks we will have Mahaela in our arms. I can't wait for my kids to meet their new sister. They are gonna love her. As Lindsey reminded me the other day, she already loves her! Makes me smile.

Still waiting to pack our bags

No, we do not have a travel date. I actually am trusting that even though we do not know the dates yet, that it is not necessarily being pushed out further. It may just mean that we have shorter notice. Each week that goes by feels like this snowball effect of much to do and less time to do it in...which is pretty accurate.
Looking forward to the next two days. No school today or tomorrow, but still busy. My day started by leaving the house at 9am and returning at 11pm. It required three trips to Peoria and beyond and traveling 200 miles! It's exhausting/I'm exhausted. We constantly say, "This is why we can't get anything done!" And it's true, we don't. Tomorrow is a bit more of the same--too chopped up to get much done at home. I am hoping to completely move Lindsey into her new room and begin cleaning out what will become Mahaela's bedroom. I will be happy with the weekend if this gets accomplished. I can dream!

I am getting another package together to send Mahaela. Just waiting on translating a message to send to her. She will have her third birthday soon. Sorry we couldn't be together for it.

Looking forward to an Orphan Care meeting at Grace Church to celebrate Orphan Sunday. I will have my own little party in my heart this Sunday celebrating the one little orphan that is no more!
I will for sure post when we know our travel dates...when I know, you'll know...you may hear me screaming (mostly for JOY mixed with a little panic!!)

Could this be the month??

We are missing this sweet little girl...

We can't wait to return to Bulgaria to pick up little Mahaela,

and leave the doors of this orphanage with our daughter, an orphan no more!

I feel some relief that the month of October is over. We realized fairly early in the month that October would not be the month that we would be able to return to Bulgaria. We are still holding out hope that November could be the month. So I am happy to see November finally here.

Saturday ended the football season for both Ryan and Jake. Aubrey continues to play basketball, but life will be a bit more simplified. Still a lot of driving, but less stress, and maybe a few meals at home in our future.
My to-do list is very long...as you would know if you just stepped one foot into my house. Too many loose ends to call my life anything but UNRAVELED! I am hoping to methodically tackle as many items on the list as I am able the next week or two.

I did receive something that makes me smile...an email from a caregiver of Mahaela. I had sent M. a package and I also emailed the caregiver a little note. I had an email address from the caregiver sending me some photos of M. from her phone. So I had a new friend translate a letter for me that I sent on to the orphanage. The response I got was sweet and friendly. They said they were speaking every day about Mahaela's mom and dad coming to get her and taking her to America. Now, she has no idea what that really means, but I like knowing that they are preparing her as best they can. We also sent a photo of our family and a photo of M. that I "scrapbooked." She said they liked the photos.
I intend to send another package this week for M. Birthday. Not sure what to send, but it will include candy for her to perhaps share with the other children in her group. I just need to think of some other things???

Still no word on traveling. We do have another week of waiting for the mandatory 14 day wait after the court hearing. Then birth certificate will be applied for.
Can't wait to hear dates of when we can travel!